So here is my response to their 10 things:
1) I think I do a great job as a single parent - better than some 'double parents' - My children have one parent that is 100% there for them - some kids have 2 parents who BOTH think things like parties are their priority ;) So if anyone has unkind words for me - it doesn’t hurt at all ;)
2) What kind of people does the author hang out with that would refer to ANY child as baggage . I suppose I don’t have anything in common with the author as I don’t have any such people in my life and if I did I’s kick them to curb.
3) Of course I am not rich but I don’t think it costs $250 000 to raise a child – I am HAPPY with my modest home and un-materialistic children who will grow up to be world changers not self entitled adults … my annual income is about $30,000 a year and we own a home, have pets, a modest car, and food in the cupboards, and access to quality health care. (We even have a pony – yes a pony that wins ribbons at the 4h fairs.) Their fathers contribute about $500 a month in total when they can. I am the sole RESPONSIBLE financial provider and that is fine.
4) There will always be some drama with the other parent? I co parent quite well with my ex husband not sure there has been any ‘drama’ for years. IN fact some of my ‘double parent’ friends have WAY more drama on a daily basis then we do!
5) I am not isolated nor lonely. I fit in where ever I CHOOSE to fit in – that has nothing to do with me being a single mother. I don’t need other single parents in my life to feel whole.
6) I Do Not worry CONSTANTLY if I am doing a good job. ALL PARENTS feel like this at some point of parenting. But overall – knowing I am doing the job of both mother and father 80% of the time – I KNOW I am an AMAZING parent.
7) I am fun – but I don’t care if I am fun or not- it’s not a character trait I would measure myself against in any way. I don’t need to go out dancing to be a fun person. In fact I don’t need to be ANYTHING for other people – who cares if some self-entitled party person who thinks dancing all night and leaning over a toilet the next day is FUN. Poor ‘fun’ people I have sympathy for them – they obviously aren’t very ‘JOYFUL or GIVING or Caring” all of which are a LOT more valuable as far as character traits go in life.
8) I don’t have any sense of SELF because I am a single parent? I have more sense of self then some women (or men) who feel they need a partner to be fulfilled in life. I am a single parent and I DO find time for me by not raising children who feel they are more self entitled then I am as a mom. So yes, I drop my kids to a playdate or arrange sleep overs for all FOUR on the same night so I can read and pamper myself. I go away on mothers day by myself to recharge. All of these things are choices that I make to be a well balanced mom who is successfully raising FOUR children who will appreciate their partners one day and realize that everyone deserves some personal time.
9) I don’t talk to my kids like an adult because I am lonely and have no one to talk to… I do however talk about subjects with my older children other families don’t. My kids understand how our government works, they know about what’s going on in the Ukraine and Syria and what the UN is. I talked to my children as infants to help them develop language skills and because I love them not because I am lonely.
10) Someone complementing our kid means the world to us… well of course and I am pretty sure I HEAR IT a lot. In fact almost every time I am out I am told how thoughtful, kind, and articulate my children are. Yesterday the pediatrician told me that sadly I wouldn’t believe how many 16 year olds in our community are using drugs and what a GREAT kid my 16 year old is. That I did a wonderful job at teaching him that ADHD can be a blessing not a curse. Strangers tell me how wonderful that at age 2 my children would try to hold a door, would say excuse me, and offer to help others.